The original brown eyed girl

THICK AS A WHAT-ALL.
Hi, I am having hard times, folks, as usual. But a wave of rage increased my anguish after revising an old mail account and reading a message which had fallen through the cracks from an ex, claiming I had to be a closeted lesbian as the only possible weight-motive for having broken up with him in the past. According to his words (translating from his frightening Spanglish slang): Jake Gyllenhaal (or, more specifically this blog) was a sort of another Merkin for me. It wouldn't be so comical if my health wasn't falling apart these days. Quoting the words of a fan of "Brick": "That made my head hurt like the sharp pain of eating ice cream too fast." -allfivesenses.
Conclusions: Despite my zillions female-crushes, I’m straight (and married). Some guys are assholes.
"Brown eyed girl" Weezer version.Source URL: https://americanendeavor.blogspot.com/2007/04/original-brown-eyed-girl_23.html
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